March 26, 2020
Thursday thoughts and how to move forward…
So I’m a hypocrite. I’m trying not to be, but I am. It’s how my mind is wired when it comes to this particular thing. I’m really really bad at accepting help from others. It’s my job to give the help, it’s my job to carry the weight, it’s my job to bottle it up inside and adapt. It’s how my mind works. Never ask for help, give the help. Be a shoulder to cry on for others, or a provider of knowledge, or just someone to sit with in a time of need. But I don’t talk about me. But my brain doesn’t let me work in reverse, it’s really pretty grumpy up there and has always been that way.
Since Saturday when I posted that PHP would be accepting someone without a ticket, and then Monday through now when PHP was just open to anyone at anytime…people keep donating money to help. Money to the program to help feed those in need because reasons. I can honestly say, I never thought of this would happen. Never thought that someone would just come forward and help me with what I’m trying to do, there are so many other amazing programs that can use help…I’ll just figure out how to pay for it because it’s what I do. I still think it’s bizarre that people read my thoughts, but thats the internet….
I’m grateful and humbled by your kindness, it’s an emotion like so many others these days I don’t know where to put. I need to be more accepting of help from people if I am to give help to people. 50/50, equal partners in life. Be a shining light for each other…
Many of you have asked how you can assist the program and I will do my best to be better at accepting of your help. It makes my heart feel better knowing that you care too. Because we call care, we are going to be better humans after this is done. You can stop down at Max & Emily’s any day between 11-2 and drop off a check, or cash, or coin, danish krone? If I seem awkward when you do, it’s because I am, but I understand how we want to help each other. It makes the world seem better. It makes us seem better. It makes us people helping people.
And because Queen Elsa seems to be living in my head these days, let’s do two quotes today. Change is hard, but sometimes it makes us better for what’s harder….
I know I left a life behind but I’m too relieved to grieve. -Queen Elsa
Second quote comes from Demi Lovato. The whole song is NOT kid friendly to play this song at home, so please find the radio edit. She’s “colorful.”
I’m my own worst critic
Talk a whole lot of shit
But I’m a ten out of ten
Even when I forget.
(Yes, we should remember this. We are all a ten out of ten) - elmo edit.